Reasons To Be Cheerful #24: Weird Celebrity Couplings

1 May

We all have friends irl (that’s in real life for those actually spending most of their time there) whose other halves we just don’t get. Normally, due to racist leanings, weird obsessions or teddy  bear collections, we think these people don’t deserve our friend. Sometimes they’re actually way out of our friend’s league, but you keep that one quiet. Obviously this happens in slebsville all the time, and it gives me hours of mirth; here’s the breakdown:

1.  Hope For Us All

When we gape at whichever half of the weird coupling it is that’s punching above their weight, there is a little voice inside that says, yes, maybe I can ensnare Ryan Gosling/Mila Kunis/Tom Hardy. Take for example the short-lived pairing of Chloe Green and Marc Anthony. Granted Marc’s no picture, but he must have done something right to marry JLo. Chloe – daughter of tax dodging Topshop mogul Philip Green – is just like us, only more rich and less good. Anyone for a Latino superstar?

chloe green marc a

Marc A with poor JLo-alike

There's a reason the sunglasses stay on

There’s a reason the sunglasses stay on

2. They Show Us You Don’t Have to Be Restricted By ‘Type’

For this point, let’s look at the bizarre case of comedian and sometime Doctor Who helper, Catherine Tate. When she started stepping out with Take That’s Jason Orange, people were understandably flabbergasted. After all she’s only funny, while he’s a lesser known member of a boyband. These days Catherine steps out with Adrian Chiles, the squashy-faced BBC cash cow who’s ‘charm’ didn’t quite translate to ITV’s Daybreak.

Could it be magic? No.

Could it be magic? No.

Re-light my fire

Re-light my fire

3. They Prove That Women Are the Less Shallow Sex

You don’t need to look at celebs to see that it’s hardly ever the woman going out with a younger, more attractive man. But here’s a list just for laughs: Mary Kate Olsen and Olivier Sarkozy (creepy), Catherine Zeta-Jones and Michael Douglas, Konnie Huq and Charlie Brooker, Sophie Dahl and Jamie Cullum, Marilyn Manson and Evan Rachel Wood, Mila Kunis and Macaulay Caulkin…





4. They’ve Shown Us How To Retain Youth

The elixir of the eternally youthful? Is it botox? Well maybe a bit, but not just that. I’m talking about being as young as the man you feel. Going against the grain, J.Lo has only gone and got herself a 25 year old at 43 years of age. Is it a coincidence that she looks so young? I think not.


Give me your youth

(REASONS TO BE PISSED OFF: I wasn’t in the vicinity when Brad Pitt went black)

Pre-rainbow family

Pre-rainbow family


One Response to “Reasons To Be Cheerful #24: Weird Celebrity Couplings”


  1. Humorous Celebrity Blog | Lucie Apampa - May 6, 2013

    […] Funny and satirical blog from my popular Reasons To be Cheerful site. […]

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