Tag Archives: celebrity

Reasons To Be Cheerful #59: The Selfie

19 Nov

kim k

If anyone wasn’t quite sure whether or not ‘selfie’ had yet fully planted itself into the public’s consciousness, then today’s news ought to settle the question. As ‘selfie’ is proudly proclaimed the Oxford Dictionaries word of the year, we can know with confidence that here is a word to stay, just like omnishambles before it. So, on this special day, I would like to take the time to give thanks to the selfie and to explore (briefly) the ways in which it has made us cheerful.

1. It’s Allowed Us to Show Our Fun Sides

Some bitter and unattractive people would have us believe that selfies are the reserve of a narcissistic society, so wrapped up in its own mirror image that it forgets to care about real problems. But what would those people know? Maybe they haven’t heard of Cara Delivingne. This confirmed queen of the goofy or ‘bonkers‘ selfie shows us that even beautiful people are willing to look silly sometimes. What a brave statement. 

Filters let us know that you're not actually ugly

Filters let us know that you’re not actually ugly

2. It’s Helped Us Show Off Our Natural Looks

Sometimes a world of lighting and fakery and Touche d’eclat just becomes too much, doesn’t it? Sometimes you just want to show the world your real face. The real you. That’s when #nofilter comes in really handy. If you’ve been vaguely interested in social media and celebrity this year (and if not, I’m not sure why you’re reading this), you’ll be aware of the make-up free selfie craze. The one that lets celebs show us that they’re not afraid to be seen in all their natural, barefaced glory. See below for how to do it like a pro.

Use the bikini distraction technique

Use the bikini distraction technique

Ignore the #nofiter rule and use a bit of optical illusion

Ignore the #nofiter rule and go for a bit of optical illusion

Make sure you're naturally pretty

But most importantly, be naturally good looking 

3. It Helps You Keep The World Posted On Your Actions

Facebook statuses have gone a long way in the battle against mystery. Thanks to FB we no longer have to guess at what our old uni chums are up to or where they’re at. It’s all there for us to see on the old newsfeed, tagged by name, place and date. The addition of a selfie works to bring an extra dimension to these happy tidbits. A feast for the eyes if you will. After all, it is such a tease to tell your friends you’re at Starbucks enjoying a gingerbread latte. You just know they’re aching to see and hopefully ‘like’  a cheeky sidealong of your big eyes peering over the top of the festive cup.

coffee selfie

Sexy works just as well

 

4. It Kept ‘Twerk’ Off The Top Spot

Though it rose to the top in the end, ‘selfie’ faced some stiff competition from ‘twerk’ in the Oxford Dictionaries word of the year 2013. I’d just like to take this moment to thank the Oxford Dictionaries team for choosing not to add more fuel to the fire of Ms Cyrus’s publicity bonfire. It’s really high time that the media stopped encouraging her fake rebellion and left her and her army of giant teddybears to twerk in peace.

Cos I don't want to give Miley any more attention

Cos I don’t want to give Miley any more attention

(REASONS TO BE PISSED OFF: Omnishambles appears to have had its day)

 

 

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Reasons To Be Cheerful #55: The Baby Weight Boom

15 Oct

main

Lately, it would seem that I cannot glance at a magazine rack or open up the sidebar of shame without being confronted, within milliseconds, by every woman’s greatest foe: BABY WEIGHT. I didn’t know this was my greatest foe until the magazines told me so. I have not got a baby, nor do I plan to be in possession of one anytime soon. And yet, I have definitely had very strong visions of doing a Davina workout in my future lounge while future baby sleeps. What kind of a world is it, where the media has me imagining: a) an actual baby and b) a Davina McCall DVD workout in a sitting room that I don’t even have yet?! THESE ARE NOT ASPIRATIONS. But, as ever, I strive for the silver lining, the positive side of things, the reasons to be cheerful (nice link, no?)

Look at the bump, THE BUMP

Look at the bump, THE BUMP

1. At Least You’re Not Kim Kardashian

Followers of this blog will be aware of my continuing bemusement and – let’s be honest – adoration of, the Kardashian klan. And though the face and front of the family, Kim has never been my fave, I certainly wouldn’t turn down a day in her life. That is, until the baby saga. I’m not going to go so far as to offer heartfelt sympathies to a woman who, having made her name from her body, is now facing harsh judgement over very same body… but I do feel for her. A quick google on KK reveals an intense obsession with her body post-North West (that’s the babby). And what’s worse, most of it is in that falsely sympathetic but hugely patronising tone that says stuff like: ‘brave Kim flaunts her curves’ and ‘Well on her way! Kim Kardashian displays svelte post-baby physique’. I’d rather continue to languish in obscurity and live my life vicariously through thinner celebs like Miranda Kerr. Cheers.

Women really need to look at the repercussions of childbirth

The frightening repercussions of childbirth

2. You Don’t Have to Be Nice to Pregnant People

Despite oft-hearing the grievances of pregnant and elderly people who claim to have been ignored on public transport, it’s not rare for me to see well-meaning members of the public battle it out to be the better citizen through seat-giving. But now we know that the main concern on a pregnant woman’s mind is fitting back into her skinny jeans, maybe it would be kinder to allow her that stand for the extra calorie burn.

3. You Might Find a Grudging Respect For Pointless Celebrities

While it’s true that around 85% of celebdom draws nothing more from me than disdain and unintentional humour, every now and again there’s a surprise player that manages to turn my opinion round. Remember Jennifer Ellison? No? She of Brookside, Dancing on Ice, lads mags and tits fame has of late reined it in with the nakedness and had a couple of babies with her fella. She’s also become the champion of new mums unwilling to bow down to the pressure of squeezing back into their size 10s within a couple of weeks of giving birth. Go Jenny! Who knew that Nuts magazine’s former ‘world’s sexiest blonde’ would gain my approval? I’m sure she’s chuffed.

Clearly Jen was just jel of Jess

Clearly Jen was just jel of Jess

4. Apparently Having a Baby is Incredibly Lucrative

In my occasional ponderings on spawning a child, just under baby weight comes the major concern of money. Babies are not just time-consuming, they’re expensive. And that’s before you’ve even bought the designer babywear. But now I know that I’ve been looking at it ALL WRONG. To turn your baby expenditure around, simply appear on a reality show, maintain your public visibility with a few lad mags shoots and then get pregnant. As publicly as possible. Now you’re in place to get a lucrative mum and new baby deal and, more importantly, you can sign a contract to have your incredible post-baby body journey recorded in the pages of a classy title like Woman’s Own or Pick Me Up. Can you smell the cash yet?

(REASONS TO BE PISSED OFF: No reality shows will have me)

 

 

Reasons To Be Cheerful #54: Downton Abbey

7 Oct

The general consensus amongst myself and friends of at least moderate intelligence is that Downton Abbey is; well, a bit shit. It’s full of clunky lines, unbelievable storylines and well below-par acting. And yet we all keep flocking to it. Why, you might ask? Here goes:

1. It’s Full of Surprises

Say what you want about Downton, but it’s not afraid to pack a punch. Last night after 50 minutes dominated by talk of syllabubs, almost-flirting and the entirely redundant Mr Mosely, Anna got raped. And let’s not forget the deaths of the family’s only likeable characters, Sybil and Cousin Matthew – both untimely, both leaving annoying other halves. One season, it jumps from the Somme to flapper in the blink of an episode; the next time round it’s a dreary parade of lone days that seems to go on forever.  Who’d want TV that was always exciting anyway? (I guess there might be a couple..)

I say Mary, I fancy I might walk again next week!

I say Mary, I fancy I might walk again next week!

2. British Pride

Downton is HUGE in America. And noone over there seems to realise quite how crap it is. It actually wins awards, and not the National TV ones that are dominated by the midriffs of soap ‘stars’. This, conversely, fills me with pride. Not so much for the show or it’s middling actors. More for the superiority of us Brits. Americans have given us The Wire, Breaking Bad, Boardwalk Empire, The Sopranos and a whole host of other really, genuinely fantastic TV programmes. And yet they still fall for what is essentially a terrible script, nicely wrapped up in beautiful period garb and the Queen’s English, just because it satisfies their ideals of Britishness. How ghastly!

One man's treasure...

One man’s treasure…

3. The Clangers

During a break from WWI:

Lord Grantham: “Still in one piece, thank God”

Cousin Matthew: “Touch wood”

Lord Grantham: “I never stop touching it”

C’maaaaan.

4. The Tabloid Fodder

It’s a world-renowned fact that any TV show is vastly improved when its viewers are able to compare the actors’ portrayal of characters to their real life selves, as seen on the pages of Heat. Well, any dedicated celeb follower will know that you can’t even glance at the Mail’s Sidebar of Shame without seeing Lady Mary or Anna hogging the limelight at some kind of premiere. Joanne Froggatt who plays Anna (and who started off as a cult runaway in Corrie a few years back) is the worst offender. It would seem that given the confidence of American success, the entire female cast now believes itself to be made up of fashionistas. Long gone are the upmarket versions of Hollyoaks and Emmerdale actresses. No, they’ve been swapped for Prada and Vivienne Westwood in a serious case of over-exposure that has been outdone only by former (that’s former) Olympic cyclist Victoria Pendleton.

Upstairs meets downstairs meets snoozefest

Upstairs meets downstairs meets snoozefest

Envelope opening anyway?

Envelope opening anyone?

(REASONS TO BE PISSED OFF: I don’t like the way they’re diluting Dowager Maggie’s wonderful acerbity by making her all nice)

Maggie I love you, but let's not lose the froideur

Maggie I love you, but let’s not lose the froideur

Reasons To Be Cheerful #39: Celebs de Cause*

14 Jun

*First off, I’m not entirely sure how to convey the plural of this, so please, no comments on the inaccuracy or otherwise of the title.

Right, now we’ve got that out the way let’s get to the meat of the situation. I am, of course, referring to the celebs who make it their business to put saving the world just slightly under their film/music career. Yes, Angelina Jolie, I’m looking at you. And don’t tell me that not just anyone can be a UN ambassador. Geri Halliwell was one. 

Saving the world, one pose at a time

Saving the world, one pose at a time

1. The Aspirational Element

I don’t know about you, but when I see Angie hanging out with foreign secretary, William Hague in the Congo, working hard to liberate the severely downtrodden; I think, I could be doing that. Ditto with Chris Martin, and those messages of peace he used to write on his knuckles. Now I’ve just to get that worldwide audience…

Doing it for the world

Doing it for the world

2. It Doesn’t Matter Who You Are, You Can Still Be Charitable

According to a highly reliable source (Hollywoodlife.com), 2012’s most charitable celebs included Justin Bieber, Miley Cyrus and renowned singer/wifebeater, Chris Brown. All it takes is a little Disney spirit, a willingness to donate and a small team of PR people.

3. They Have More Meaningful Things To Donate Than Their Fortune

In 2010, AIDS charity, Keep a Child Alive launched an awe-inspiring celebrity campaign. The revolutionary tactic involved stars like Alicia Keys, Lady Gaga, Elijah Wood and Rihanna going – wait for it – OFF TWITTER – until $1 million was raised. These ‘digital deaths’ were accompanied by completely non-insensitive, but totally shocking images declaring our favourite stars to be ‘dead’. Take a moment.

kk is dead

Takes your breath away

4. Couples That Care Together

It’s fantastic enough when you find a celeb that really cares about the world, but when their other half does too, it’s even better. And, if said other half can care in a gender-appropriate way, well then you’re laughing. For cases in point, see renowned do-gooder Bono and caring actor Colin Firth’s wives – both designers of ethical fashion lines. Clap clap.

The discerning celebrity couple

The discerning celebrity couple

(REASONS TO BE PISSED OFF: There just isn’t enough love in the world)

Reasons To Be Cheerful #32: Music Videos

22 May

When I was a teenager, everyday after school I got home and turned on MTV Base to watch the R&B videos of the day. There was lots of Tweet singing about ‘loving herself’ and Nelly getting hot in hurrr. But I guess music’s just not what it used to be. These days I indulge in a music video only occasionally, but when I do, I go to town. I’m talking entire hungover days (that’s approx 4pm-10pm). Here are some reasons to be cheerful about them:

1. The Fitties

Music vids are undoubtedly full of fitties. Whole armies of them in fact. Men, women, singers, dancers, frame-fillers – they’re all horrendously good-looking. Some are even naked. But weirdly enough, it’s nearly always the women that are naked. This is nothing new, it’s practically a standard – not even practically, just is. Just look at Pharrell’s latest video (and oldest actually). It would be weird for women to be wearing clothes in these. Or another favourite of mine, Pitbull.  There’s nothing quite like seeing a man that looks like your pervy uncle being pawed by topless women. What glass ceiling?

No, let ME have him!

No, let ME have him!

**This is the tame version! It’s all Youtube would allow. For full effect just visualise the girls without tops.

2. The Variation

Now and then an original music video comes along; normally by someone like MIA or artists you’ve never even heard of like Bingo Players (see below). But most of the time diversity is just not a watchword for popstars. Nicki Minaj? She’s in a wig and not much else. Taylor Swift? Boring narrative about whichever famous male she’s just dumped so she can write a song about him. Guetta? He’s at a beach/some kind of Ibiza party DJing, obvs. Any male hiphop artist? Why, he’s somewhere surrounded by boobs and cars. But we’ve already covered that.

 

3. Celeb Appearances

These days you’re noone unless Pharrell Williams is in your video. Or maybe Kanye West, who also likes to do a little cameo. I like these celeb cameos because you get to see who’s mates with who in celebsville. It can be quite depressing though. Everyone and his mum’s boyfriend turn up in Chris Brown’s videos. Cheers for the solidarity.

Spot  Pharrell, Diddy, Bow Wow, T-Pain, Nelly and Timbaland.

4. Air Brushing

Airbrushing is everywhere these days. Forget the celebdom, just scrawl to your more annoying Facebook friends – you know the ones with all the selfies – and tell me honestly that there’s not been some rudimentary Photoshopping. Never-the-less, for me noone does airbrushing quite like the music video. And after all, who needs ‘features’ anyway?

It's Britney bitch

It’s Britney bitch

Breathe? Through plastic (this is Blu Cantrell in case you've forgotten)

Breathe? Through a plastic face? (this is Blu Cantrell in case you’ve forgotten)

(REASONS TO BE PISSED OFF: Noone goes to the videoshop just to rent out Thriller anymore. The magic of MTV is no more).

 

Reasons To Be Cheerful #28: Rihanna’s Hair

8 May

If there ever was a true chameleon among the collective follicles of the stars, it would have to be Rihanna’s. Today we see her sporting long golden locks where yesterday it was a pixie cut, and all without a glimpse of the sticky extension attachments. Is there then, hope for us all? Probably not – most of us don’t have Rihanna’s face or hair stylist, but that’s no reason not to appreciate them. Some reasons for cheeriness:

1. It Doesn’t Give A Shit

Rihanna’s hair doesn’t pretend to be real. It doesn’t work to the conventions of hair growth (fake or authentic). Rather it gains 10 inches overnight without so much as an apology. I strongly suspect that the public has seen neither hide nor hair (unintended) of Beyonce’s real locks for some years now, but you don’t see her admitting it with dramatic length change. Hail not giving a fuck.

Personal fave

From this…

To this

To this

2. It Works In Any Colour

Trashy blonde, bright red, caramel, brown, black. Whatever, they’re all working. Even when the hair is obvious wig it still looks bangin’.

??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????Rihanna-blonde-hair

3. It’s A Key Trend Predictor

Remember when Riri first went red? One week later and about 80% of black girls and 40% of all other girls had suddenly developed a taste for the brash hue. Poor man’s Rihanna, Rita Ora also broke out on the scene around the time of Rihanna’s trailer trash phase with copycat hair. Since then she’s been stuck on blonde while Jay Z’s protegee number one has seen more wigs than hot dinners. The hair just knows.

Blonde ambition

Blonde ambition

4. It Doesn’t Do ‘Off Days’

I have yet to see Rihanna’s hair looking unkempt. Granted its had dodgier days – earlier R&B princess and short asymmetric weren’t favourites of mine – but it’s always had purpose. Who else’s hair can say that? Maybe Gwyneth Paltrow’s, but who wants to write about a bore-off?

Pre-naked Instagram phase

Remember sweet Rihanna?

(REASONS TO BE PISSED OFF: The way Rihanna lets her hair down by sleeping with Chris Brown)

THIS hair???

THIS hair???

Reasons To Be Cheerful #27: Children of The Rich + Famous

7 May

Pixie and Peaches Geldof, Tali Lennox, Jade Jagger, Kimberley Stewart, Paris Hilton… Some people might see these names as synonymous with words like ‘talentless’ and ‘sponge’ or ‘wastrel’ but here I would like to espouse some of their better qualities. Reasons to be cheerful are as follows:

Daisy and Pearl Lowe: Thanks for the fame mum

Daisy and Pearl Lowe: Thanks for the fame mum

1. They’re a Reminder That Your Life Contains Meaning

After the initial jealousy that these people – who have done nothing but be born – get invites to Coachella, the Met Ball and other hot tickets… After that, you realise that they have no real purpose in life besides picking up cool friends and becoming a mid-level designer’s ‘muse’. They also think that  being in a band equates to ‘breaking out.’ At least you’re not deluded.

Rumer Willis: she may be at Coachella but she's still no Demi Moore

Rumer Willis: she may be at Coachella but she’s still no Demi

2.  They Make You Glad That You Don’t Have to Compete With Your Parents For Attention

When you go home and visit your parents, your parents’ friends tend to be pretty interested in you. Your job, other half, enduring singledom, successes and failures will probably be more interesting to them then the domestic bits and bobs they already know about mum and dad. But imagine, if you will, that your mum is a leotard-wearing popstar. See Cher’s transgender son (formerly daughter) for tips on coping.

From Chastity to Chaz

From Chastity to Chaz

3. You Have Friends, Not Publicity Props

If you look closely at any photo of a Kelly Osborne/Pixie Geldof/Jaime Winstone with her arm draped around another celeb, you will see in her eye the subtle glint of an F. Similar to the dollar sign, this golden flash screams only for fame.

Gimmieeeee

Gimmieeeee

4. Your Name Doesn’t Predicate You Being a Bellend

Much as we might like to denigrate the annoying sons and daughters of talented celebretants, it should be noted that all is not their fault. Imagine if you were called Memphis Eve (Bono), Jermajesty (Jermaine Jackson), Pixie, Peaches or Fifi-Trixabelle. Just think about it.

Prince Michael II 'Blanket' Jackson

Prince Michael II ‘Blanket’ Jackson what does the future hold?

(REASONS TO BE PISSED OFF: I think this post might reek of bitterness)

Reasons To Be Cheerful #25: Smug Celebrity Couplings

2 May

While you don’t have to be rich, successful and beautiful to be smug, it certainly helps. And in our pond-deep society it’s fairly rare to come across a celebrity who doesn’t tick all of the above. Now when you combine those attributes across two people and create a union, well then you have a different beast altogether. Let’s look at what we can thank smug celebrity couplings for:

1. They Show Us That ‘You Are What You Eat’ is More Than Just a Saying

When smug marrieds no.1, Gwynnie ‘the health’ Paltrow and Chris ‘I save the world with peaceful messages smeared across my knuckles’ Martin spawned baby humans, they took a typically wholesome approach. We already know that Apple, aka baby no.1, subsists on nutrient-infused apples alone (Granny Smith for savoury, Pink Lady for a special treat); and it can only be so long until baby no. 2 reaches his rightful destiny. Yes, we’re talking to you Moses.

Fruit of their loins

The fruit of their loins

2. They Show Us That Platonic is Just as Powerful

The recent spate in celebrity BFFs has seen seemingly-inseparable duos taking over various party scenes and effectively using each other as publicity props. Rita Ora and Cara Delevingne are the latest pair to milk this particular brand of sromance (?) and have barely left the pages of the FeMail since embarking on their whirlwind. Other recent offenders include Nick Grimshaw and Harry Styles who shamelessly encouraged rumours of bumming, and Rihanna and Katy Perry, the former of whom couldn’t quite be bothered to make it to her bessie’s wedding.

Come on, just one more for the paps

Come on, just one more for the paps

3. An Example In Turning Over a New Leaf

Nothing screams ‘end to wildchild days’ like settling down in the country (or Primrose Hill), having a baby or two and embracing a life of domesticity. See Peaches Geldof and Lily Allen (or Cooper, whatever) for prime examples of this. Know that even if you are a 22-year-old hasbeen who’s past their peak and living off daddy, it’s NEVER TOO LATE.

Happy being boring

Happy being boring

4. Nobody’s Perfect

Heidi Klum and Seal: not long ago one of celebdom’s most apparently successful marriages looked like they could weather a storm of even Rebecca Loos proportions. Unfortunately, it was not to be so. A couple of years after announcing plans to launch a TV show where they would help other couples to be as happy as they were, it turned out that Klum was getting with the help. So, as I said, nobody’s perfect.

Who knew this couldn't last?

Who knew this couldn’t last?

(REASONS TO BE PISSED OFF: The smugness never ends. It just moves onto the next relationship).

Reasons To Be Cheerful #24: Weird Celebrity Couplings

1 May

We all have friends irl (that’s in real life for those actually spending most of their time there) whose other halves we just don’t get. Normally, due to racist leanings, weird obsessions or teddy  bear collections, we think these people don’t deserve our friend. Sometimes they’re actually way out of our friend’s league, but you keep that one quiet. Obviously this happens in slebsville all the time, and it gives me hours of mirth; here’s the breakdown:

1.  Hope For Us All

When we gape at whichever half of the weird coupling it is that’s punching above their weight, there is a little voice inside that says, yes, maybe I can ensnare Ryan Gosling/Mila Kunis/Tom Hardy. Take for example the short-lived pairing of Chloe Green and Marc Anthony. Granted Marc’s no picture, but he must have done something right to marry JLo. Chloe – daughter of tax dodging Topshop mogul Philip Green – is just like us, only more rich and less good. Anyone for a Latino superstar?

chloe green marc a

Marc A with poor JLo-alike

There's a reason the sunglasses stay on

There’s a reason the sunglasses stay on

2. They Show Us You Don’t Have to Be Restricted By ‘Type’

For this point, let’s look at the bizarre case of comedian and sometime Doctor Who helper, Catherine Tate. When she started stepping out with Take That’s Jason Orange, people were understandably flabbergasted. After all she’s only funny, while he’s a lesser known member of a boyband. These days Catherine steps out with Adrian Chiles, the squashy-faced BBC cash cow who’s ‘charm’ didn’t quite translate to ITV’s Daybreak.

Could it be magic? No.

Could it be magic? No.

Re-light my fire

Re-light my fire

3. They Prove That Women Are the Less Shallow Sex

You don’t need to look at celebs to see that it’s hardly ever the woman going out with a younger, more attractive man. But here’s a list just for laughs: Mary Kate Olsen and Olivier Sarkozy (creepy), Catherine Zeta-Jones and Michael Douglas, Konnie Huq and Charlie Brooker, Sophie Dahl and Jamie Cullum, Marilyn Manson and Evan Rachel Wood, Mila Kunis and Macaulay Caulkin…

Really??

Really??

REALLLLLY???

REALLLLLY???

4. They’ve Shown Us How To Retain Youth

The elixir of the eternally youthful? Is it botox? Well maybe a bit, but not just that. I’m talking about being as young as the man you feel. Going against the grain, J.Lo has only gone and got herself a 25 year old at 43 years of age. Is it a coincidence that she looks so young? I think not.

jlo

Give me your youth

(REASONS TO BE PISSED OFF: I wasn’t in the vicinity when Brad Pitt went black)

Pre-rainbow family

Pre-rainbow family

Reasons To Be Cheerful #13: The Kardashians

12 Apr

I don’t know about you, but I love a fame whore. And a whole family of them? Well it just doesn’t get any better than that.

For me, it’s not about having a favourite. I only feel warmth towards Khloe*, Bruce* and Lamaar*, but warmth is not  equable to entertainment. See Kris for lessons in this. Anyway, I’m waffling, here are my reasons to be cheerful:

*A family tree for the less Kardashian knowledgeable readers

1. The ‘Glamour’

DASH

Class personified

You can always look to Kim et al for a lesson in glamorous. As joint owners of classy retail venture Dash (thats KarDASHian – took me a few weeks to figure this one out), sisters Kim, Kourt and Khloe lead the fashion pack. What’s more, they know that you never leave your foundation, highlighter, eyeliner, mascara, blusher or fake tan behind. Only the basics.

2. Scott Disick’s Style

Super Saturday 13 to Benefit Ovarian Cancer Research Fund - Arrivals

Scott’s hair has changed recently and this upsets me. I miss the fabulous slicked back look that he has sported for God knows how many years, and it is this style that we will celebrate. Scott’s gelled barnet is commonly accompanied by excessive fake tan, an open necked shirt and some good (if not tasteful) tailoring. I always fancy that he sees himself as an updated Christian Bale in American Psycho. And he certainly pulls something off.

scott disick bale wannabe

American Psycho

Kardashians - american psycho

American Wannabe

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

3. Kris Jenner Is Not Your Mother

Supermomager

Supermomager

Oh Kris, you are the matriarch of the show, the reason that many people probably now think it’s OK to spell Chloe Khloe, and a great, if guilty, viewing pleasure. But I am so glad we are not related. As manager and mom to her kids, the path for fame was set from birth. It’s pretty fortunate that all the sisters look good in a bikini, because that’s the kind of outfit that Kris likes to manage them into. As for fat Rob, well, he doesn’t count. He couldn’t wear a bikini anyway.

4. The Christmas Cards

This needs no words, just look at the pictures:

White Christmas

White Christmas

Leather Christmas

Leather Christmas

Beach casual Christmas

Beach casual Christmas

(REASONS TO BE PISSED OFF: Kourtney’s choice of child names failed to continue in the K family line. Surely Kim and Kanye’s kids are a dead cert)