Tag Archives: social media

Reasons To Be Cheerful #65: The Hashtag

23 Apr

necklace main

In this wonderful modern age of social media where narcissism and unashamed showing off are happily encouraged, nay facilitated, by a whole range of platforms, the hashtag is a welcome break. With a fair few exceptions (#nofilter springs to mind), this faceless international treasure is just as comfortable sitting next to arabspring as it is to 4dayweekend. So let’s celebrate this modern beacon of shortcuts with a blog post from #r2bc.

1. They Encourage Wit

Hashtags bring out the best in people. They help those of us not naturally gifted with effortless funnies to dig deep within ourselves for a part-word, part-acronym to attach to a #. They encourage accidental moments of genius like #susanalbumparty. The person who came up with that one probably didn’t even know that s/he was a comedic riproarer.

#Getinvolved

#Getinvolved

2. They Enhance Celebration Days

Today is St Georges Day, or as Twitter would have it, #stgeorgesday. To some of you, this celebration might seem like a day reserved for NF thugs and the kind of people who fly mini England flags from their car, but on Twitter, it’s for everyone. People used to say, there’s no Christmas without a tree or there’s no Easter without Jesus, but come 2014 there’ll be saying there’s no Christmas without a hashtag. #merryxmaseveryone

Making it mean more via @SantaC

Making it mean more via @SantaC

3. #PeopleNotQuiteGettingIt Right

One of the beautiful things about the normally tech-averse getting involved in social media is that they tend to get it wrong. Take the friend of a friend who affixed #open your eyes to one of his statuses, or the people with no sense of the concise. Like Vogue. The month that Vogue lost its head and featured Kimye on its cover was also the month that it plastered this along the front page  #worldsmosttalkedaboutcouple.

The hair has begun to sap the magazine's life force

It was inevitable that the hair would sap the magazine’s life force eventually

4. Sticking it To The Man

There are not many things quite so satisfying as when a corporate giant – assured of its marvellous customer relations – takes to Twitter to stir up some positive affirmation only to find themselves stirring up shit instead. Take British Gas.They took to Twitter last year with #askBG,  only to be rewarded with salient questions like, is it cheaper for me to burn £20 notes than put the heating on this winter? Or Maccy Ds who, in search of some touching tales of finding lost puppies in the straw dispenser, initiated #McDStories. Here’s a McDStory: a woman is accused of offering sexual favours in the drive-through lane in exchange for McNuggets. Warms the heart…

(REASONS TO BE PISSED OFF:  #DancePonyDance)

You are NOT Stevie Nicks

Fuck off, pony

 

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Reasons To Be Cheerful #53: Recruitment People

2 Oct

handshake

In my lengthy dealings with the people who call themselves ‘recruitment consultants’, it has become increasingly apparent that the potential bridge between me and my dream job is – to be quite frank – formed from a barage of idiots and liars.

They join the salespeople, the taxmen and the estate agents in that special low place at the bottom of the general (self-respecting) public’s esteem. They speak in jargon, perpetuate bullshit and are generally bad for the soul, but as I’ve always said, noone’s all rotten. Even Mussolini had his good points I’m sure. So let’s dig deep for the reccies…

'Please don't expect to hear from me again'

‘Please don’t expect to hear from me again’

1. They’re Good at Getting Back To You

Say what you want about recruitment people, but if they like your CV they will call you as soon as they’ve seen it. I like to see the subsequent interrogations – in the disabled loo, always during work hours – as a good 20 minutes of interview practice. I mean, there’s no use getting annoyed just cos they asked you questions instead of actually reading your CV, before failing to ever contact you again.

2. They Know Their Shit

Being told that I ‘sound like a social media whizz’ by a recruitment person who’s not even on Twitter, but who is calling me about a marketing job, well there’s no compliment quite like it. And when she follows her informed comments with an emailed person specification that fails to match me on a multitude of levels, well that’s even better.

3. They Say What They Mean and They Mean What They Say

When a recruitment worker says, under no duress, ‘I’ll send you an email this afternoon’ you just need to know that ‘this afternoon’ roughly translates to ‘the 12th of Never‘. And when they say ‘you’re a perfect fit for this role’ you just need to know that what that means is ‘you’ll never hear from me again‘. It really is that simple.

4. If They Can’t Help You They Know Someone Who Can

Sometimes – admittedly occasionally – recruiters admit on the phone that X or Y job isn’t right for you. Clearly this is a questionable strategy as compared to the usual strategy of straight lies, but us jobhunters can take it. Anyway, when this unusual turn of events does occur, it often turns out that recruiter’s colleague has many more roles that are right up your street. They’ll be passing your details on. Expect a call soon (see point 3).

(REASONS TO BE PISSED OFF: How can there always be recruitment positions when there are no other jobs?)