As my Facebook newsfeed has become increasingly saturated with weddings and babies, I’ve finally had to admit the truth to myself. I am getting OLD. Not old like pensioner old, but old like, you should be a responsible, mature adult with financial stability, a pension and maybe even a mortgage old. The damning truth is that at least half of those descriptions do not apply to me and while I’ve always felt assured that these things would just fall into place by the time I reached the big 3-0, its scarily fast approach is beginning to cast doubt on my former confidence. So this post is really about making me – and you (?) – feel better…
Although I never had a wedding dreambook like Monica in Friends, ever since I knew how to have fun I’ve looked forward to my friends tying the knot. This anticipation has obviously been much enhanced since I started getting drunk, though the sad fact is that free bars these days are few and far between. There’s nothing quite so special as watching two dear friends enter into a lifelong partnership, except that is, for the top 5 of reasons why weddings are great. The list goes: fun day out, all day boozing, old friend reunions, cheesy dancing, dressing up. Boom and done.
2. Other People’s Babies
Other people’s babies are great in the same way that other people’s dogs are great. You can give them back when they get annoying and/or smelly. What’s not so great is the constant barrage of Facebook updates about said babies. Naturally, if you are reading this and have a baby that you like to post more than one picture a day of, your baby is the exception, because it is, of course, better than all the other ones (aka, I’ve hidden you from my newsfeed).
3. Climbing the Greasy Pole
It’s so great to feel that you’re reaching your career peak in your late 20s. Or at least I imagine it must be a great feeling. I wouldn’t rightly know. But starting again at 27 and doing well so far feels like passing my driving test the first time after I started up my second bout of lessons. Although I’d previously failed two driving tests and had in the vicinity of 100 lessons, the mere 20 lessons it took me to pass ‘first time’ felt like a fantastic achievement.
4. Mature Dressing
I went to a vintage shop the other day and instead of sniffing at the enticing scent of a bargain and a bit of character, I just smelt mustiness, and I did not like it. Now that I’m in my late 20s I like new clothes that nobody has died in, and though I still have not achieved my dream of owning activity-appropriate outfits for all occasions (eg: all-whites for tennis), mature dressing feels as great as I look (don’t).
(REASONS TO BE PISSED OFF: The term ‘quarter life crisis’)